I'm sorry. Is that what you want to hear?

I guess I'll have to set my pride aside and be the first to say "I can't live without you in my life."
I never meant to hurt you. I need you, I miss you, I love you. Yada Yada. My life just isn't the same without you in it. You have always been like the little sister I never had but always wanted. I'm truely ashamed of myself for setting that kind of example for you. I can be a horrible person sometimes, I hate it. I wish I was different, really. I wish I was an entirely different person so you didn't have to deal with me. I just want you to know how much you mean to me. I don't want us to be like Danielle and Jamie. Thats the not the type of relationship we have. I know your ready. Your just scared, and i'm here to tell you; You don't have to be. You are such an enormous part of my life and without you, there is a gaping hole in my heart, there is a huge part of my life that is missing. You have been more of a sibling to me than any of my real siblings have been. But it's not just you i'm sorry to. I'm GREATLY apologetic to Jamie. I shouldn't have wrote about Lexi that was totally out of line. I love her and I adore her kids. I can't live without you guys in my life. Caleb has always filled the hole in my heart where Jaiden was supposed to be. I cry every night hoping things will get better. I'm sorry to you, Aunt Kathy. I really disrespected your family and I am sorry for being an asshole. You have done nothing but give me a place to stay when I needed one. You would feed me when you could barely feed your family. So I guess i'm sorry to all the Mccarthys.


You guys are the only family I have. Please forgive me.
Especially you, Bethy. I feel like I have really let you down and hurt you so deeply.

Give me a second chance.?
Even though we both know I don't deserve it.

I miss you.